BANGTAN: the only bulletproof item you need in your daily life.

Have you ever tried to escape fate but it kept haunting you instead? That was BTS for me.

The first time I came across these seven boys, I was attending my very first KPOP event and I was shook as I witnessed the crowd’s reaction once a BTS song started playing. Although they are incredibly rising by the minute, KPOP fans are still a minority in my country so I wasn’t expecting such a dedicated and organized fandom. I was envious and jealous.

After the event, I came back home and I couldn’t help but get that song stuck in my head. I remembered every other group and song despite hearing them for the first time since I was only into BIGBANG and 2NE1 back then: Seventeen’s mansae, Exo’s call me baby, 2pm’s go crazy … I remembered BTS, but I just couldn’t pinpoint the song.

It took me about a week or so humming the song inside my head and watching myself go mental. I finally decided to shut my ego down and look up their MVs since the song was projected in the event. Talk about irony at its best, I went through every single MV of theirs, but once I got to the actual song I turned it off and went to sleep. The next morning, I begged my sister to look up the song for me since she was more familiar with KPOP; for that matter I only gave her one hint: Neoppuniya, Neoppuniya (which I shamelessly pronounced as Nappeuniya until I got corrected four months later by Twinsie in a very chaotic Karaoke session, 고마워 베이비).

The ARMY reading this will guess that it was indeed “War of Hormone”; I still can’t believe that this song gave me a headache for a whole week. When Sunnie found it, she played it for me and I literally asked her to shut it down because it’s noisy and went back to doing my business … Luckily for me, she was patient enough and stood there with her phone blasting the song until the hook started playing. The moment I heard it, I immediately felt levitated and turned back to face her, only for her to turn the music off and confront me with the most devious smirk ever: “I thought you said this was noisy, never mind you don’t need it anyways”.

After several pleas and bribes, my sister finally agreed to give me the song’s title. As I went to check it on Youtube, I admit that I was a bit shocked at how strong the lyrics were … but I was quickly tamed when I read “Girls are the best gift”: Way to redeem yourselves, boys. 

Nevertheless, my love story with BTS didn’t start until I found out that they were BIGBANG’s biggest fanboys. I was suddenly interested in them because whoever loves my faves the way these boys did deserves admiration or, at the very least, respect. It was thanks to Mey that I actually discovered this information who, by the way, also showed me how to properly stan BIGBANG. She then advised me to contact Fey who is basically our ARMY squad’s MVP: the girl literally breathes, feels and projects BTS.

Following her instructions, and after taking up a whole month to perfectly identify the members (in my defense, I already knew Rap Monster, J-Hope and Jimin), I could finally allow myself to be called an ARMY. Soon enough, the boys became my everyday salvation, their music was my healing process, and their stories gave me strength.

Although I still haven’t watched all of their variety nor do I recognize some of their side tracks from the first go, I feel spiritually connected to OT7: not as a fan but as an individual, their aura gives me serenity and I know that every ARMY relates to this. One thing that I have learned from these precious boys is that I can be me and still do things right. Therefore, for all of you reading this I want you to stay true to yourselves: it’s not a piece of advice, it’s a life lesson.

My name is Esmee and I am an Adorable Representative MC for Youth.